Why Grandma, What A Load Of...

Now, I know you're supposed to love your family unconditionally, but my Granny makes it very hard for me to love her. We're having family round for a late Christmas lunch today, and my Granny immediately made her presence known. I was sitting in the lounge with my cousins, Uncle and Granny, when my uncle says;

'Elton John's had a baby, you know'

At this my Granny looks taken aback and replies

'But I thought he was a queer'

'Well they used a surrogate mother...'

'Well I think it's all wrong bla bla blaaaaaa'

... Now I didn't realise my Granny was homophobic, and I know she's an old lady and came from a generation were they weren't very accepting but my Grandma and Grandpa on my Mum's side are the same age and are a lot more accepting, and it made me very cool towards her for the rest of the day.

There's also her obsession with cats.

I have a cat called Grettle, who's a beautiful calico with the brain the size of a pea and the same amount of energy as Hammy from Over The Hedge. Last year my Granny was stalking Grettle around the house so the cat took refuge in my room. Nobody goes in my room without my say so, but yet my Granny dared to enter. I told my Mum about this and she had a word with my Granny.

'Olwen (that's my Granny's name), she doesn't really like people going in her room'

'Oh, but she was fine with it, she didn't seem to mind...'

'Well, she's too polite to say but...'

'... she was letting me fuss her and purring'

'Olwen, CHLOE doesn't like people going in her room'

Anyway, that concludes my rant.

Peace out, see ya! xx